A wedding is the joyous celebration of the
two people who commit themselves to living together and creating a family.
I had the pleasure of attending such a
celebration for Jacob Betrogo, financial administrator at the Protestant
Hospital in GB, and Ruth Neusene Salatou. They live in the house next to mine,
but the wedding took place in N’gaoundéré (about 3 hours northwest of GB – now
that the road is paved!)
Just like in the US, fancy invitations
invited guests to attend. Here, though,
they are generally delivered by hand and not by mail. The one I got has English on the outside
(probably coming from Nigeria) and had a couple of French pages inside. At the reception, I saw others who had
invitations that looked like passports.
Mine is pictured at right.
Couples are officially married twice
here. First, they are married at Town
Hall; this is the civil ceremony. Jacob
and Ruth had their civil ceremony at 9 a.m. Saturday, November 29. I decided not to go to N’gaoundéré until
Saturday morning, so I missed that part.
(I had only been back from Yaoundé a couple of day, taught two classes,
and was recovering from Plan Q – see the last blog entry.)
The church wedding where the couple makes
their commitment before God and the congregation happened at the Millennium Lutheran
Cathedral at 3 p.m. Well, that was when
it was scheduled to start. It actually
started at about 4 p.m. Parts of this
service are the same as a wedding in the US, but parts are different. There was a bulletin which gives the schedule
as:
- Songs by the choirs (Yes, they had two. Both had great, lively music, mostly in French, but some in English.)
- Arrival of the groom. The brides’ maids and groom’s men process in first and line the main aisle. Then Jacob entered with a woman of his family. He was seated on a couch (love seat size) in front of the pews. The woman sat on a covered chair next to him.
- Then, after some
more music, the bride processed in with her father. The groom’s men sprayed fake snow/confetti
from cans as she came down the aisle.
Ruth sat next to her husband-to-be with her father on a chair next to her. Both the bride and groom wore white.
- Many invitees wore clothes made from material that the bride chose. (See the people with the blue print cloth). Others chose material that a whole group wore (choir, family, etc.)
- There were photographers taking video and still photos. I have to say that I found this to be intrusive. Many times they hid the couple and the “action” of the ceremony as they stood in the way to take pictures. You can see one photographer in the shot of the bride’s procession.
- Hymn
- Welcome and Invocation
- Confession of sins
- Promise of Grace
- Song by one choir
- 2 Bible Readings (read by friends)
- Confession of Faith
- Song by the second choir
- Sermon: One pastor was the liturgist and a second preached. He talked about the texts read and what it means to be married. I thought, personally, that ½ hour was too long, so he lost me toward the end…
- Liturgy of Marriage
- Institution and Introduction
- Vows of the couple
- Exchange of rings
- Benediction of the couple
- Hymn
- Presentation of a Bible to the couple
- Speech by the
family of the groom
- Speech by the family of the bride
- Speech by a representative of the church
- Presentation of gifts (for those who were not attending the reception later)
- Prayers
- Photos with the family
- Final Benediction
- Recession lead by the couple, wedding party, and then guests.The whole wedding took about 2 ¼ hours until about 6:20 p.m. (Too long for me, but it’s not about me, right??) By the final recession only about ½ the congregation was left (so maybe it was too long for them, too, especially since we started an hour late).
The wedding reception was held at the Hotel
Mentong Palace on the outskirts of town.
The invitation said 8 p.m. I went
with Elie Sanda (ELCA financial administrator for Cameroon/CAR) and his
wife. We didn’t go at 8, but arriving at
8:45 we were still the first to arrive.
Festivities started at 10:30 p.m.
(Sigh. All day we did a lot of
waiting.)
The reception also started with a
procession – of the bride’s maids and groom’s men and then the bride and
groom. These young people did two dances
for the guests – choreographed and enjoyable.
Then there was grace and we ate.
A woman from the hotel announced the menu for two buffets then tables of
guests were directed to one buffet table or the other. (So why were there
different foods? ?) Food was plentiful
and enjoyable, but not very warm despite chafing dishes with flames beneath them. A large room was full, so I’d estimate there
were over 200 guests. (They don’t have
people return cards to get a count; they just make enough food!)
After we ate, the bride and groom left to
change clothes. After more than an hour
of waiting, I had had enough. It was
after midnight and since Dr. Solofo and Dr. Joely were leaving I left with
them.
So what did I miss? There was another presentation of gifts and
other formalities and then dancing that went on until about 4 a.m. I
heard. I am sure it was fun. Still, I am not much of a party person,
especially when I don’t know many people and festivities get off to such a late
start. And, the waiting tired me
out. I was happy to go to the guest
house for a good night’s rest!
I wish the couple all the best in their
married life!
I stayed in N’gaoundéré Sunday since Anne
Langdji and Andrea Walker were arriving that evening from the Cameroonian
Pastors’ Retreat. We went to dinner at
the Coffee Shop and shared news.
When I left Monday, I took a load of medical
supplies destined for the Lutheran Clinic in Gallo, CAR that had been delivered
in a container from World Health Ministries.
(They were temporary stored in my entry way until the people from the
clinic picked them up Wednesday.) I also
stopped in 
By the way, I opened the can of humus (referred
to in the last blog entry) yesterday. It
is OK. A nice change of pace, but too
salty for my taste. Also, it was not
very creamy. (Served here with tomatoes
and avocado with salt and pepper) I don’t
know if I will buy it again, but I am glad to have the variety and experience. It makes me think that I will look for chick
peas and tahini to make my own! The
seaweed (some of which I added to a cabbage dish) was better. I used one of the spice packets which made the
food a bit hot, but well within my low tolerance. 
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